2016-11-21

be kinder

I have high expectations of people. For anyone that knows me, this is not a surprise. I have equally high expectations for myself, with a few exceptions where I get a pass because I'm me.

While this is partly a product of my expectations, it's also a result of being a guy, and guys rib each other about things. For many of us, it is about as close as we come to showing emotion to most people. But that "guy emotion" has bled over into other parts of my life. Sarcasm has grown thick, and commentary isn't what it should be to those I care about.

I'm really good about holding my tongue when it comes to people I don't know well, but for some reason I seem to think that I shouldn't have to do that with people like my wife or family. But I'm wrong, absolutely wrong. These people matter, perhaps even more. I'm not sure how it got to this point, but when I compliment or thank my wife for something, the first thought is that I don't meat it at all.

So I'm trying to improve how I interact with these people. For instance, I'm trying to tone down if not eliminate sarcasm. This is going to be a long road, one that has been paved over the decades. Despite whatever I may intend, this won't change overnight. A little better today, and little more the next. Eventually there won't be sarcasm.

But until that time, I have to remember that I am trying to be nicer, and when I say something sarcastically I don't mean it to be hurtful, it's just me trying to not say whatever it is negatively. Poorly, it would seem.

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